Sometimes, actually most times I don't know why or how things work out the way that they do. Sometimes, in college, I just feel lost and like I don't really know what's going on half of the time. It seems like I study and study and study and try and make sense of what is going on in each class. -Now I realize taking so many classes and getting a new job that has more hours and helping plan for my wedding it just all adds up- but on a poor college student, I think that is when most kids start doubting themselves and their confidence in supporting the direction if their life. Things add and build up and they know what they are doing is supposed to help them in the future and with supporting themselves and their families but it's often so hard to have that perspective when you're in the moment.  I found out that my grades are improving today (not that I have ever really gotten bad grades) but I am honestly seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.  Also, with so many classes it seems hard to stay focused when you bounce around from class to class to class.  I worry that it is going to catch up to me especially around finals time. Today in my class that I am struggling the most with I found out that right now I have a B- and that it jumped up from a C- with the last test.  I don't know why it is working out so well right now but it is, and for that I am grateful!